I was a tech bro
Yes, women can be tech bros and I was one of them.
When I think about what pisses me off about all the major, richest Personalities in tech right now (Musk, Altman, Zuckerberg, and the like) is that they remind me of my younger self.
I studied Computer Science in college and I became super influenced by people and ideologies who had the absolute most Free Market takes. I’m talking pure, unadulterated survival of the fittest mindset where anything and everything goes. Step on whoever to get what you want. I won’t even get into some of the more problematic behaviors I experienced in my youth being in these hyper techy online circles.
Now, these days I’d call that mindset borderline sociopathy but back then it felt like the only winning mindset. Some of us (myself included) had sympathetic reasons for coming to cynical, pessimistic conclusions about the world and society. Some of us were young dealing with brutal trauma, pressures to climb social ladders from immigrant families, objectification, or even just common social pressure to fit in with those around you. I know I personally had little backbone when it came to my opinions and would just agree with whatever the loudest person in the room said about anything. This became funny (not funny) when I tried to predict what they’d say to impress them and I’d get it wrong and then flip flop immediately. Truly an embarrassing time for myself.
I’m also not saying that trauma makes you a bad person, but I do think it may lead some people to extreme cynicism. There’s a quote from Art Spiegelman I like: “Unimaginable suffering doesn't make [people] better - it just makes [them] suffer.”
The thing is, most people grew up, learned more, listened, and changed. We became more patient over time, kinder, gentler, and open to differing opinions. Some did it at different rates or times, but eventually most people changed (and those who never did or took too long, I’ve cut out of my life). Sometimes change only came once people started to get more comfortable in their own lives and had the room to reflect. There’s a feeling of “better things aren’t possible” that can truly infect your brain if all you’ve known is different forms of suffering and few people came to help you.
I think it’s also easy to fall into a cynical mindset if you have little political or economic power yourself. Because there’s essentially little perceived consequence to your beliefs. Many of us were just a few years into voting age with little dollars in our personal banks.
What I really can’t wrap my head around is that there are people who are older, who should have spent more time in their lives listening to other perspectives, with all the social and economic capital of the world who are still cynical and do not care to make the world a better place. There should come a time in your life where you grow up and want to see a better world because you find out that “Oh, law and society can be changed. Therefore, we can make things better.” And yet they continue to use their influence to only make the world worse for the common person.
So those big tech Personalities strike me as incredibly naive and dull and remind me of a freshman Comp Sci dorm room.
In some sense, I see how my naive, cynical, younger self was correct. If I had just built any software regardless of the awful societal consequences it might have, perhaps I could be a Billionaire today. Having zero regard for other people or the consequences of your actions is how you can get ahead as there is little to no accountability or protection for people. But it really really doesn’t have to be that way. We can have a more equal world and I truly believe all lives (even those at the top) will be better off for it.
At the very least, how does ego not drive them? If they worked to change society such that the law actually protects and secures comfort for people, they could be heralded as heroes forever. Instead, these lunatics will go down in history as the vapid vampires that they are.
What’s even crazier is I’m not even sure trauma drives their cynicism! Sometimes the biggest bastards haven’t suffered a day in their lives!